Episode 2 - Xassie the Snot!

Xassie: "heLLOXArlos"

Me: ("What th ...!!!???!!!")

Her voice had that sul tery wave that could melt Hercules into a puddle. There *is no* proper response to such, just, "BuBuBuBu ..." as you reveal that she has once again succeeded in turning your brain into mush!

Me: Who are you?

Xassie: I'm Xassandra -- Xassie for short.

Me: How did you get in here?

Xassie: You left the gate open, remember?

Me: Huh?

Xassie: When you set your brain free, remember?

Me: So, what are you doing here?

Xassie: Oh, your Self invited me in for a snack, a gnosh, as it were, some really good SALAMI, and I decided that as long as the *SALAMI* holds out, I'll just make myself at home and hang around for a while - and -- nibble.

Me: You can't do that!

Xassie: I most certainly can. Got an agreement with Self!

Me: **WHAT?** He sold out on me again? I thought after that last incident we weren't going to do that anymore.

Xassie: That's between you and him. Meantime, I find ...... your ...... SALAMI ...... pretty ..... UuuuMmmmm ....... TASTY.

Me: So, just what is this agreement?

Xassie: Well, for one thing, I get to hang out and run around with him, and he feeds me SALAMI.

Me: And in return?

Xassie: I gave him an unopened bag of Chesapeakes!

Me: He sold Me out for an unopened bag of Chesapeakes?

Xassie: And ...... shall we say ....... some FUTURE considerations.

Me: Such as?

Xassie: Well, that's really not for me to say. A part of our agreement is that I'm not supposed to tell you about the CONSIDERATIONS.

Me: Why? Why not?

Xassie: Ask him.

Me: Yeah! Right! He's never told me the truth before. Why should I believe him now?!?

Xassie: Maybe that's why you're supposed to ask HIM.

Me: What? Because he lies to me all the time?

Xassie: Weeell, he doesn't exactly lie, now, does he?

Me: No! Might as well though. His answers are always confusing and answer absolutely nothing.

Xassie: Well then?

Me: So, while you're gnoshing on my SALAMI, what am I supposed to eat?

Xassie: Well, there's still some Chesapeake's left, and, I just happen to have some ....... nice ....... fresh ......... TUNA.